You have complete control over your shirt selection. You already know what you enjoy and what you want to eat. You’re even free to choose which magazine you want to read.
However, if you live with a toddler, you may discover that there is a pint-sized member of your household that believes they know more than you (and their friends, and their teacher, and everyone they come across). Toddlers are most likely to be bossy. This isn’t a fun stage, but it’s entirely typical. Thus, how to handle bossy kids- is one of the common questions parents have.
How to Handle Bossy Kids?
Fortunately, you can get through this without converting your home into an absolute monarchy. Here’s how to deal with bossy kids.
#1 Be Patient.
One of the main reasons why kids are bossy is- that they just imitate the conduct they see daily. Not that you govern your home with an iron hand, yelling orders at every turn, but your child knows that you tell people what to do (particularly, the kids in the family), and they want in on the fun.
They are also learning to communicate their desires. While assertiveness and bossiness aren’t always desirable characteristics, they can be beneficial (in limited doses) as children grow older.
#2 Ask for a Behavior Change.
Remind kids to use their manners if they start telling you or someone else to do something. Explain that if they ask respectfully, rather than demanding, you are more likely to do anything for them—play a game, read a tale, or help them change their shoes.
#3 Give them some power.
Bossiness in children is frequently the result of a child’s need to feel in charge of a situation or their life. This is especially true when a child becomes older and more self-reliant. As a result, put kids in circumstances where they can make decisions or act like a “grown-up.”
When it’s time for lunch, for example, provide two options (making sure that either choice is acceptable to you). Allow your child to choose the game to play when you’re getting ready to play with them. Allow them to “supervise” the dressing of a younger child. Your child can be the boss in these situations, satisfying their desire to be in command.
#4 Involve teachers and caregivers.
If you fear your child’s bossiness extends outside the home, get the support of individuals who regularly interact with your child to help you monitor the situation and intervene when necessary.
#5 Turn the Tables.
Pull your child away for a calm conversation if they start barking instructions at others. Ask them how they would feel if a friend instructed them what to do all the time. Avoid telling your child that if they continue to be bossy, they will lose their friends, but do explain that if they are constantly told what to do, they may prefer to play with someone else. If the scenario is competitive—for example, if the kids are playing a game—try diverting them to something else.
#6 Teach students how to ask the right questions.
If your child starts bossing you around, correct them right away with the language you prefer: “When you say ‘Please may I have the blue cup,’ I will give it to you.” However, you should not do this in front of your child’s friends or siblings, since he or she may feel ashamed. Pull them aside for a private conversation or chat with them after the audience has left.
#7 Make it clear that they will not always get their way.
Hearing “no” is a life lesson that your child would be better off learning now. Your child may prefer that their sibling go down the slide or swing instead of riding the seesaw at the playground, but your child’s brother is a person with a right to their own opinion.
#8 Always praise them for being polite.
When your child behaves appropriately, point it out to them. They’ll be relieved that you noticed and are more inclined to repeat the behavior in the future. When you praise them; they feel good, and listen to you next time.
In a Nutshell:
Demanding and bossy behavior in children does not have to be a bad thing. Parents can develop it into great leadership qualities with little effort. Children are likely to live up to your expectations of them it is entirely up to the parents to mold their children into the people they wish to see them as.